5 Places You Shouldn’t Go in Louisville If You’re Avoiding Someone

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We all feel a little antisocial sometimes (some more than others).

But whether you are avoiding an ex, that really annoying coworker, your old high school friend who is back in town and whom you really don’t want to make time to see—or just feeling like you want to escape the world for a bit—there are 5 places in Louisville that you shouldn’t go if you seek to evade awkward social situations.

The Food Court at St. Matthew’s Mall

It all happens so quickly. Initially, you are making “just a quick stop” to pick up a small last-minute birthday gift for that person whom you don’t really know well enough to buy them an incredibly thoughtful gift, but who invited you with enough sincerity to their party that you can’t show up empty-handed.

One moment you are debating between a plethora of meager gift cards, and the next you have been lured westward by the enchanting, crave-inducing, if slightly nauseating scent of Auntie Anne’s mixed with Chick-fil-A topped with Sbarro.

Then inevitably, just as you are about to stuff a sample of bourbon chicken in your mouth, you make eye-contact with the exact person you were seeking to avoid. Now you stand, eyes widened, mouth pursed around the sticky, tough orb of chicken, unable to speak. So you just awkwardly wave and turn away, reminded of why you stopped coming to the mall after you exited your angsty Hot Topic phase.

Dairy Kastle on a muggy Friday night

Do you really think you are original when you say, “Hey, you know what sounds good right now? A Brown Cow from Dairy Kastle!”

It’s 90 degrees outside and the air is so thick it looks like the interior of a hookah joint on Bardstown Road; so a milkshake is really the only acceptable dessert-beverage hybrid in this weather. However, everyone else in Louisville had this same clever idea, so if you are looking to be covert, avoid the line at Dairy Kastle.

Trust me, in the time that it will take you to get from the back of the line to the counter, you’ll realize that you know at least six of people. Possibly eight if you count friends of friends. More if you count the faces you recognize, but just can’t place. And chances are, the person you were setting out to avoid will be right in front of you in line.

Any brunch establishment on Sunday mornings

You love brunch.

All Louisvillians love brunch.

Nothing ruins a good mimosa like running into that person you really didn’t want harshing your mellow on a Sunday morning.

Heine Brothers’ Coffee midafternoon

2pm hits, and you have lost all will to live. Or at least to continue working until you have a reasonable amount of caffeine flowing through your body. However, break room coffee is not an option as it is perpetually weak, watered down and crusted to the sides of the coffee machine.

And besides, you really just want to get out of the office. Janice and Jason’s “secret” office romance is draining.

“I’ll just make a quick stop at one of Heine Brothers’ 14 locations. I may even take some work and be productive there.”

Just kidding.

You won’t be productive at all, because everyone else on your floor fled their cubicles for lattes, and all ended up at the nearest Heine Brother’s, and much to your chagrin, Janice and Jason are sitting at the table next to you with one Chaiburg and two straws.

Walking Bardstown Road. Any time. Ever.

Don’t do it. Trust me. 

 

Where else is a no-go when it comes to avoiding people? Let us know in the comments or tweet us @louisvillecom. 

Cover photo courtesy of Shutterstock. Copyright Rasstock

About Ashlie Danielle Stevens
Freelance writer based in Louisville, Kentucky. Writing curator of eclectic experience.
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