The Quest for Manliness [Sports]

Print

The Wall Street Journal has recently come out with their list of the manliest cities in America- they’ve determined manliness based on…amount of bar fights in the course of two months? I’m really not sure, however they claim that these are accurate representations of testosterone around the country, and their findings show that the manliest city in America is Oklahoma City, Oklahoma.

I’ve been to Oklahoma City, I have family in Oklahoma City I don’t know that it’s necessarily the manliest city in America however with a past featuring cowboys and gunfights I can certainly understand that ranking.
The least manly city: San Diego, California, I’ve been to San Diego and I don’t know that it’s necessarily the least manly city in America however with a past featuring the polar opposite of cowboys and gunfights I can certainly understand the ranking.

So, where does Louisville fall on the list? A respectable eleventh slightly manlier than Cincinnati but not quite to where Charlotte is in regards to that elusive “manliness.”

As such this is a call to arms to all the men in the city of Louisville, we should break the top ten! And, I have plans to do just that involving mens’ favorite obsession—no not that obsession, second favorite obsession: sports!
We need to begin more manly sports leagues in this city for instance Semi-pro Head Butting where in two guys strap on soft helmets and just run smack into each other head first like well a ram. I don’t know how the scoring will work in this competition, but roller derby got popular nationwide and to this day nobody knows how to score that sport. I’m pretty sure it involves amount of beer consumed though.

Which leads me to another sport synchronized beer chugging, two guys artfully and with classy music (something from the catalog of George Thorogood perhaps) chug beer while twirling a baton, I know what you’re thinking but the baton is on fire and weighs 200 pounds.

How about professional Segalling that’s where, with the very manly Steven Segall is in mind a team of men try to snap more necks quicker than the other team. If that doesn’t do anything for you how about Norrising, in the vain of Chuck Norris men race each other to see who can dye their otherwise gray beard a ridiculously fake color.

I could also support Australian rule football teams- assuming we make it much more violent or of course football- minus the pads or Hockey- minus the hockey and everything none fight related.

Men, these are just ideas and I know that we can come up with more ridiculous ways of hurting ourselves in pursuit of manliness. And well, I think it’s about time we start.

We’re comin’ for ya Charlotte!

Oh by the way the list from the Wall Street Journal is right here:

Manliness City in America

Image courtesy of Propeller Net

About Dave Rose
Recently, I completed a Masters degree in Education and have been writing for Louisville.com for over a year now, prior to that I published a humor book for young adults titled Wearing Socks with Sandals, a book about getting through high school, college, and all of the requisite problems that present themselves during that time. Currently, I spend much of my time in classroom settings as well as writing in various areas. Of course, I’m a big sports fan and love music and film, and love finding new stuff around Louisville.
More articles from Dave Rose
Like us on Facebook!
Subscribe to our RSS Feed!
Follow us on Twitter!
Add us to your circles on Google+!
Follow us on Pinterest!
Follow us on Tumblr!

Search Louisville Events

More Events | Post an Event | Event Map
fri
24
sat
25
sun
26
mon
27
tue
28
wed
29
thu
30

Search Louisville Restaurants

Louisville Independent Business Alliance

 

Copyright © 2014 Louisville.com, All Rights Reserved
137 W. Muhammad Ali Boulevard, Suite 102, Louisville, KY 40202
502-625-0100
Mobile Site