This week, in Louisville, on Craigslist: lonely Valentine's Day edition

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Valentine's Day can be lonely for the single person. Or the romantically-attached person looking for a little something on the side. Don't worry, you're not alone in your loneliness. These Craigslist posters share your pain.

This week, in Louisville, on Craigslist...

A non-smoking college graduate sits at his desk wishing he had a housewife to exchange innocent emails with.

A "lonely guitarist seeks muse!" An evening of cocktails, beautiful music-making and dreams come true is all this guy wants. "Time is ticking by fast, so, don't hesitate!"

Man seeks woman for "Taboo Fun in Church." "Any ladies ever wanted to do it in the church? Free until 5:30 and alone..."

Another man seeks a woman for sexual adventure in the Kroger at Forest Springs. Here's the scenario: "We don't set a place in the store to meet but we search for each other. When we find each other we both have small piece of paper in our hands that says: "It's me." We swap the pieces of paper and then see how much "sexual fun" we can get away with... Who knows maybe we end up in the stall in the men's room or back in one of our cars."

A woman is "20 young and single and ready to mingle :-)!" "I'm an unique individual who love to get fun I desire someone who always going to be there for me and not lie to me.about anything value me in a esteem you as well !"

A princess seeks her prince. Her criteria weeds out about 80% of men on Craigslist. She wants "a male 45-55 who would never post a picture of his JUNK on here."

In the M4M category, things are simpler:

One man is "Looking to take some ***** up my ***....totally disease free....you be too!!!!

Another says, "Love to **** till you **** that ****. Im very clean and can host.

And all this guy wants is some "hot nasty sexy!" He's home all afternoon. "*** by and **** your ****..."

 

About Amy Talbott
Piscean. INFJ. Cat person. Runner. Mediocre housekeeper. Excellent cook. Scours the sleaze on Craigslist so you don't have to.
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