No – really, listen up here because this is a moment that we’re about to have over the internet. We’re going to have a moment in the way these moments are meant to be had: faceless, nameless and devoid of feedback or acknowledgement. We’re going to float in the void together like some fishies in the soupy sea. It’s possible our hands might touch, but we can’t really be sure. Ready?
This is an article where I should use words like “responsibility” and “security” peppered in with choice phrases like “life goals” and “monetary stability” and “peace-of-mind planning”. This is an article about retirement planning. I should pander to you in the way that makes human beings feel normal and comfortable. In the same way that a fresh coat of white paint makes a tired apartment appear bright and livable. We like that. But I’m not going to do that.
Matt Dicken, the author of the book Retirement Planning in a New Direction: A Return to Common Sense, is a financial planner and the Founder and CEO of Strategic Wealth Designers. A Kentuckian with national acclaim for his monetary advising, Dicken is devoted to helping both retirees and pre-retirees “secure their financial futures” by investing their money thoughtfully – and, apparently, with common sense. This is a good thing to promote, in my opinion. Dicken will bring this book and this wisdom to The Summit location of Barnes & Noble  this Saturday, December 15th, at 2pm for a reading, signing and maybe a shot or two of some good, off-the-cuff financial acumen.
I didn’t finish my thread up there. You may have noticed that dangle of thought leaving question marks in your head. What happened to the fishes in the soupy sea? – you may have asked. Where are the touching hands in the blind void of internet? – you also may have asked. Did I miss the moment?? – you may have seriously, seriously asked. You may have been all of a bother for a minute.
Listen: some people need to plan for the Life Parts of their lives. That’s the path that looks clear and right and well to their eyes. It might be one of those paths with that beautiful caramel-colored dirt, soft and powdery, it looks like it would radiate warmth and lead to somewhere that has a chimney. And that’s fine. That’s probably a pretty nice way to live. Most of these butterscotch, toffee, nougat places – paths made of succulent candy-word soil – have lots of Wide Open around them. Pasture-like stuff. Liberating. Or the dense and quiet green from old pine trees. These are dark, but soothing.
It’s very bucolic, what I’m doing here with the imagery.
But these places are usually just paintings – from my vantage point at least. They’re hard to fine in real life. Or maybe less liberating and soothing than at first glance. That caramel-cream Earth might just be dirt on your boots. It’s possible that the people that plan for the Life Parts with these paths in mind know some secret to traipsing them that I have yet to discover. I think some of us are just better living in the world as Un-Planners.
There it is: It’s ok. I think it’s ok to be an Un-Planner. So I wouldn’t worry too much if this is you. Because it’s me, too. And we can do the floating, black soupy sea all you want until it feels better and less-voidy.
But, you know – go and secure your future with Matt Dicken, if that’s better to your ears. That’s a good thing for some people, too. And we like Good Things for all people here in this world.
The Summit area location of Barnes & Noble is located at 4100 Summit Drive. For more information, call (502) 327-0410.
Image: Courtesy of Louisville Free Public Library www.lfpl.org 
But I also found this picture of a horse in the snow when I searched the book’s title (Retirement Planning in a New Direction: A Return to Common Sense) for an appropriate accompanying photo. I thought it was another Good Thing. (www.nakedcapitalism.com )