Ahoy, mateys!  Derby Dinner Playhouse presents the children's theatre productions of How I Became a Pirate beginning this Saturday.  

How I Became a Pirate performances will take place on Feb. 25, March 3, 10, 17, 24, and 31.  Breakfast performances will take place at 10 a.m. with buffet at 9 a.m.  Lunch performances will go on at 12 p.m. with buffet starting at 11 a.m.  All performances are to happen at Derby Dinner Playhouse, located at 525 Marriott Drive in Clarksville, IN.

Yes, the Fair is in town. Don't get me wrong, I've been known to slam draft beers and ingest giant sausages, then sweat profusely while chicken-dancing under a giant tent on the midway with the best of them, but there is something about the allure that of the KY State Fair that just doesn't do it for me anymore. Maybe the parking, maybe the crowds, maybe the overdose of ugly--tomatoes, lamps (dare I say, humanoids), but the Fair is the last place I want to spend my weekend.