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    With Christmas season upon us, it seems like the right time to offer a quick tour of the area’s local shopping establishments.  Previously, we’ve looked at the Green Tree Mall, Oxmoor Center, Jefferson Mall, and the Mall St. Matthews.  We now mercifully close out this series with a look at both Bashford Manor and Raceland Mall, the two most awesome yet difficult to find malls in all of Louisville.

    PROS:  Bashford Manor and Raceland Mall are conveniently located within miles of one another on the same stretch of Bardstown Road.  But keep an eye out or you might miss them both!

    Raceland Mall has often been praised for its post-apocalyptic sensibilities and “I’ll CUT YOU, MAN!” approach to customer service.  Make sure to keep your head on a swivel because you never know from which direction you’ll find yourself being overpowered by savings (or a tweeker with nothing left to lose).

    The jam-packed parking lot sort of gives off a car dealership-vibe, but don’t let that fool you.  Of course, when you actually enter the building, the fact that there’s a bunch of dudes who try to sell you a car also sort of gives off that same vibe.  But once you get past all the shenanigans, you are confronted with the awesomeness that is Raceland. 

    Sparse is the operative word, considering the entire mall only has three stores.  A CSC, which if memory serves me correctly is a great place to buy tampons and dill pickles in bulk, a Radio Shack that only sells D batteries and broken calculators that permanently display the word BOOBS (80085), and a hair salon, whose sole employee, named Linda, may or may not carry a gun in her purse.

    Looking for a little entertainment while your parents are fighting off one of the many angry crack dealers who shuffle about the place?  Then hit the movie theater.  I’m pretty sure the only films they show are Cannonball Run and The Apple Dumpling Gang Keeps a Secret about That Time They Elephant Walked around the Campfire, but at least you’ll be safe from the gaggle of desperate PCP-powered humanoids that have devoured your family!


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    Patrick Fawcett's picture

    About Patrick Fawcett

    When I was a boy, I met Darth Vader at Raceland Mall. I also got to hug a Jawa. I have spent everyday since then chasing that high.

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